Irresistible force paradox

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The Irresistible force paradox, also the unstoppable force paradox, is a classic paradox formulated as "What happens when an irresistible force meets an immovable object?" This paradox is a form of the omnipotence paradox, but that paradox is most often discussed in the context of God's omnipotence ("Can God create a stone so heavy it cannot be lifted, not even by God Himself?").

The paradox should be understood as an exercise in logic, not as the postulation of a possible reality. According to modern scientific understanding, no force is completely irresistible, and there are no immovable objects and cannot be any, as even a minuscule force will cause a slight acceleration on an object of any mass. An immovable object would have to have an inertia that was infinite, and therefore infinite mass. Such an object would collapse under its own gravity and create a singularity. An unstoppable force would require infinite energy, which does not exist in a finite universe.

But, my favorite analogy would be parents and their recalcitrant children, especially teenagers. Talk about your irresistible force:

Being a Consistent Parent to Your Teen

A very common behavior in adolescents is that they do not listen to their parents. When a parent talks to them, the message goes in one ear and out the other. One reason teenagers do not listen to their parents is that adults often do not mean what they say - or don't follow through on what they say. This simple concept is extremely important to keep in mind in any type of dealings with your teenager. Inconsistency on the part of the parent is often the basis for the teen not listening, and is one of the main reasons that techniques tried by parents do not work.

We do not listen to adults who say one thing and do something else, so we cannot expect our teenagers to listen to us if we behave in the same way.

There are many ways in which parents are inconsistent and thereby confuse children or teach them to be manipulative or not to listen. Some examples follow.

Empty Statements

• Unless you come in right now, I'm going to break both your legs.
• If you don't straighten up in school, I am going to send you to boarding school.
• I'll kill you if you don't stop bothering me.
• If you and your brother don't stop fighting, I'm leaving home and never coming back.

I'm sure you could think of many other similar statements where parents say things they have no intention of carrying out. The adult knows this, but, more importantly, the child knows it too. Therefore, using threats like these will not stop the behavior and the child will continue the behavior you are trying to modify.

Overstatements

• Go to your room. You are punished until you are 18 years old.
• You cannot talk on the phone for the entire school year.
• You are grounded for a month.

Overstatements like these are also a major source of inconsistencies in families. Parents get angry and make a promise or threat they can never keep. Or they say or do something and then start feeling guilty. As the guilt increases, they may try to do something to undo the comment or reduce the punishment if the child shows appropriate behavior. However, in both instances, the child interprets the parents' behavior as saying, "Don't believe or listen to what I say because I don't really mean it."

Turning "No" to "Yes" and "Yes" to "No"

In this situation, the parent says one thing and does something else. Remember the example of the teenager who asks to use the car and is told "No"? The youngster does not accept this answer and starts to harass his parents. After a time the parents give in and let him use the car in order to end the argument and preserve their sanity. Here, the original "no" has been changed to "yes." How many times have you promised something like this: "I'll take you shopping Saturday. We can also practice your driving this weekend. And I'll help you work on your car this Sunday"? However, when the time comes, you say, "I'm a little too busy this weekend. We'll do it next weekend."

The major point here is that a "no" has been changed to a "yes," or vice versa - that a positive statement has become negative. Not only are we teaching our children not to listen to us when we respond in this fashion, but we are also showing them how to manipulate us. In other words, we are saying, "If I tell you something that you do not like, do this [complain, get me upset, argue] and I'll change my mind." This type of inconsistency should also be avoided.

Not Checking Up on the Behavior

You can also show inconsistency by telling your child to do something and not checking to see that it has been done. You tell your son that he cannot leave the house until he cleans his room. He goes in his room while you are busy somewhere else in the house. In a few minutes he comes out and says, "I'm leaving." You ask, "Did you clean your room?" and he responds positively and leaves. Half an hour later you happen to pass his room and notice that he has not picked up a thing.

The necessity to check on behavior and performance is not important in the case of some adolescents, but for others you have to follow up and see if the child has done what he was asked to do or what he was supposed to do. Some children will try to get away with as much as possible if you let them. This form of inconsistency on the part of the parent tends to interfere with the development of responsibility and also teaches children to be manipulative.

Again...the article continues.

So...

• The FOP voted to stop the BOE from creating an Assistant Principal's position at CJSHS.
• The next month, the FOP told the BOE "NO"...again.
• Then the Cairo BOE changed the name of the position...to Administrative Assistant.
• The FOP wobbled, but did not fall.
• The BOE, sensing the FOP was on the ropes, pummeled away...changing the name yet again, coming up with a flowery, two-page job description for a "Curriculum Instructional Specialist/Coach".
• THUD...that sound you just heard was the FOP FLOP!

I shall admit...the Cairo Board of Education is good at what they do. They make a decision - good, bad, or ugly - without soliciting the input of employees or taxpayers...and stick to it, come Hell or high water! If anyone objects, call "Robbers All"...DEFEND US! Money is no object!

Ooh, one gets weary...

However, the savaged CATs shall NOT be dissuaded from the good fight. Hey, that's what CATs are for!

Oh, the BOE (aided and abetted by the FOP) have their "victory"...there is nothing that can be legally done to stop or overturn their decision to increase administrative positions - BY TWO...at the cost of at least $150,000.

Superintendent Swopes will stroll (strut?) into this morning's 8:30 a.m. meeting with union leaders and say with straight face that "the District is broke". Superintendent Swopes will claim that the financial emergency faced by the District requires that the District close buildings...fire teachers, teacher aides, secretaries, maintenance personnel, and custodians...cut services to students. Superintendent Swopes will say that the District has no choice.

Superintendent Swopes will then (maybe) finish the day, drive to his taxpayer-paid cottage, and, weather permitting, grab his clubs and hit a few golf balls. (I say "maybe", because Friday before last, I happened to return to Cairo at 2:54 p.m. I glanced toward Cairo Jr./Sr. High School. The parking lot was still full of employee cars because the final bell does not ring until 3:14 p.m. There - in plain view of God and taxpayers - was Cairo Superintendent of Schools Leotis D. Swopes hitting golf balls! If THAT had been an employee on break or a teacher on their planning period, I would probably not be typing this "missive" right now. Instead, I would be preparing the defense for a suspended/terminated employee...)

I have tried not to rant, or to at least soften my remarks with gallows humor. However, if I could be allowed one catty comment...yes, to heighten emotions...

Superintendent Swopes would most likely take offense at my "reporting" his pursuit of pleasure on the golf links of CJSHS during the business day. And, I must admit, he would have a good argument. I can hear him now..."Look, you bitched about me leaving every Friday at noon. I stayed this time! What the hell was I supposed to do until 5 p.m. on a Friday?"

Well, hush my fuzzy mouth...

Yes, what the Cairo Board of Education does day-in, day-out is discouraging. It can make one weary.

But, as my spiritual adviser keeps whispering in my ear...